Letting Our Prayers Reshape Our Lives

“The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.” - Soren Kierkegaard

"I pray because I can’t help myself. I pray because I’m helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time- waking and sleeping. It doesn’t change God- it changes me." - CS Lewis

Reflecting in yesterdays post, along with some other things brought me to the idea of prayer. And the above Kierkegaard quote stuck out in my head. Because a unified church has to start with each of us personally. My prayer needs to be, "Lord how can I better live out Jesus' prayer that we (the church) be one as You and Him ar e one?" Our lack of respect or unwillingness to discuss, openly without judgment, the convictions and thoughts of others is something we have to take a personal responsibility for. 

This Kierkegaard quote always brings me back to Moses. 

The Lord told Moses, “Quick! Go down the mountain! Your people whom you brought from the land of Egypt have corrupted themselves. How quickly they have turned away from the way I commanded them to live! They have melted down gold and made a calf, and they have bowed down and sacrificed to it. They are saying, ‘These are your gods, O Israel, who brought you out of the land of Egypt.’” Then the Lord said, “I have seen how stubborn and rebellious these people are. Now leave me alone so my fierce anger can blaze against them, and I will destroy them. Then I will make you, Moses, into a great nation.” But Moses tried to pacify the Lord his God. “O Lord!” he said. “Why are you so angry with your own people whom you brought from the land of Egypt with such great power and such a strong hand? Why let the Egyptians say, ‘Their God rescued them with the evil intention of slaughtering them in the mountains and wiping them from the face of the earth’? Turn away from your fierce anger. Change your mind about this terrible disaster you have threatened against your people! Remember your servants Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. You bound yourself with an oath to them, saying, ‘I will make your descendants as numerous as the stars of heaven. And I will give them all of this land that I have promised to your descendants, and they will possess it forever.’” So the Lord changed his mind about the terrible disaster he had threatened to bring on his people. Then Moses turned and went down the mountain. He held in his hands the two stone tablets inscribed with the terms of the covenant. They were inscribed on both sides, front and back. These tablets were God’s work; the words on them were written by God himself. When Joshua heard the boisterous noise of the people shouting below them, he exclaimed to Moses, “It sounds like war in the camp!” But Moses replied, “No, it’s not a shout of victory nor the wailing of defeat. I hear the sound of a celebration.” When they came near the camp, Moses saw the calf and the dancing, and he burned with anger. He threw the stone tablets to the ground, smashing them at the foot of the mountain. He took the calf they had made and burned it. Then he ground it into powder, threw it into the water, and forced the people to drink it. Finally, he turned to Aaron and demanded, “What did these people do to you to make you bring such terrible sin upon them?” “Don’t get so upset, my lord,” Aaron replied. “You yourself know how evil these people are. They said to me, ‘Make us gods who will lead us. We don’t know what happened to this fellow Moses, who brought us here from the land of Egypt.’ So I told them, ‘Whoever has gold jewelry, take it off.’ When they brought it to me, I simply threw it into the fire—and out came this calf!” Moses saw that Aaron had let the people get completely out of control, much to the amusement of their enemies. So he stood at the entrance to the camp and shouted, “All of you who are on the Lord’s side, come here and join me.” And all the Levites gathered around him. Moses told them, “This is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says: Each of you, take your swords and go back and forth from one end of the camp to the other. Kill everyone—even your brothers, friends, and neighbors.” The Levites obeyed Moses’ command, and about 3,000 people died that day. Then Moses told the Levites, “Today you have ordained yourselves for the service of the Lord, for you obeyed him even though it meant killing your own sons and brothers. Today you have earned a blessing.” The next day Moses said to the people, “You have committed a terrible sin, but I will go back up to the Lord on the mountain. Perhaps I will be able to obtain forgiveness for your sin.” So Moses returned to the Lord and said, “Oh, what a terrible sin these people have committed. They have made gods of gold for themselves. But now, if you will only forgive their sin—but if not, erase my name from the record you have written!” But the Lord replied to Moses, “No, I will erase the name of everyone who has sinned against me. (Exodus 32:7-33)

This isn't the first time Moses has had to intercede for Israel. I've posted before and I'm sure I'll say it again, Israel was a major thorn in Moses side. They kept him from enter the promise land by not believing Caleb and Joshua and trusting that God had their back. And I honestly believe it was frustration with the Israelites that led Moses to disobey God with the waters of Meribah.

But I was thinking about these stories with this new perspective in mind. What would have happened if Moses hadn't interceded for Israel? The first time Moses says "Ok ok I'll pray for you." The second time he says "Ok, ok guys, once more." But maybe the third time Moses just stays silent when God wants to wipe out Israel. What would happen? Would God have wiped Israel off the face of the Earth? Would Palestine currently be fighting with the descendants of Moses? Or would Moses have been punished for not praying for his fellow Israelites? Was it a test of Moses character?

We'll never know the answer to that, but I have some thoughts. Those prayers shaped Moses. They had! Most of us would gladly let God destroy the people who are causing us so much strife! But Moses asks God to remember his promise to the faithful who came before. Moses "reminds" God that he doesn't want His (God's) own name to seem powerless by wiping the Israelites from the face of the earth. Why would Moses keep praying for the Israelites? I don't know for sure but I have some thoughts.

Moses got to spend time in the presence of God! He got to see God face to face and talk to God voice to voice. Moses had a special relationship with God. It would've been easy for Moses to feel special and superior. Why shouldn't the descendants of Moses be the ones to enter the Promised Land? But Moses had already done hard time in the desert. He'd seen plenty while living with Pharaoh and he'd seen hardship, tending sheep as a fugitive in the wilderness for his father-in-law. And God found him, to call him back to Egypt to be the guide for his people Israel. Moses understood God's character. Moses knew that God's promise to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob still mattered and wasn't going to go unfulfilled. It probably didn't hurt that at one point early on God wanted to kill Moses but Moses' wife intervened. (Exodus 4:24-26) Having to deal with Israel kept Moses pride at bay. Yes, he spoke face to face with God, but the people he was leading were just as stubborn and disobedient as they were when they left Egypt. While it was frustrating, I'm sure at times Moses felt bad for them. There had to be some love for them. And I believe Moses knew that Israel getting to the Promised Land was much bigger in the grand scheme of life than just someone getting there with God's blessing.

I talked in my last blog about praying for the Islamic State. That's a tall task to ask someone to pray that a terrorist group would come to Jesus because we've all witnessed and been upset and hurt by their actions. I wrote a post years ago about Love Wins and touched on the idea that there are people we don't want to see in heaven. And that's a personal issue. I struggle with certain biblical teachers, TV news anchors, and politicians I disagree with. But in wanting to see us unified and one, I have to pray prayers that don't ask God to change others, but to change myself to relate better with others. How do I engage in conversations with a healthy respect for someone I might not agree with? How do I love them and truly hear them out, and present myself and my case, without getting frustrated and calling them awful names? How do I interact with people at the grocery store, coffee shop, or homeless guy on the street in a way that shows a genuine interest in their life that reflects God's love and care for them? What should my response be when I watch TV and see terrorist killing my brothers and sisters? How do I pray for someone I'd just as easily see destroyed?

I need to change my prayer life from asking God for blessings and things, and find a prayer life that reshapes who I am and how I interact with those around me. Because those will be the things that matter more in the end.